There are plenty of reasons to walk instead of drive. Reasons other than not having to pay insurance, car/lease payments, tolls, etc. Living in the city is a great reason not to drive. Not being in in the middle of a serious exchange of kinetic energy is another good reason. I haven’t been at fault in any accidents, though I have had my fair share of idiots who decided to facilitate a transaction between my insurance company and a body shop.

I’d say the best one was when I was at a toll booth, second in line, and the person in front of me backed up into my car at what seemed to be full acceleration. This was on my way home from someone backing up into my driver-side door in the CompUSA parking lot. Good times! Anyway, on with the show.

 

You can still end up getting sandwiched between two men

Your truck could get totally fucking mangled

Your car could get raped against its will

What’s gonna crush you first, the median or the 18-wheeler?

You could be hanging for dear life by a boat

Forced to walk by having your car frozen in place

You could nearly be penetrated by a guard rail

You might just be an idiot

You could get wrapped around a pole

Birds could assault your fresh paint job

Compact car? No problem.

Haven’t you always wanted to be in a pile-up?

You could drive a motorcycle through a car

… or under it

or be Ben Roethlisberger

… or how about under a car?

…or somehow drive and crash on top of a bridge

…or dangle off of a bridge

Or just plain fireball off of a bridge

Buy me a beer if you liked this post or found it helpful