05
OCT
2007
I absolute loved the reply to this craigslist post. I found out about it on Howard Lindzon’s blog.
The Post on Craigslist
What am I doing wrong?
Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy.
I’m not from New York . I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City, so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all.
Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 200 - 250. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?
Here are my questions specifically:
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings
-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)?
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there?
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows - lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY
Please hold your insults - I’m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I’m being up front about it. I wouldn’t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn’t able to match them - in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 432279810
The Reply
Dear Pers-431649184:
I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.
Firstly, I’m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here’s how I see it.
Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here’s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here’s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won’t be getting any more beautiful!
So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you’re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn’t make good business sense to “buy you” (which is what you’re asking) so I’d rather lease. In case you think I’m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It’s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as “articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful”
as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn’t found you, if not only for a tryout.
By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn’t need to have this difficult conversation.
With all that said, I must say you’re going about it the right way.
Classic “pump and dump.”
I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.
Buy me a beer if you liked this post or found it helpful
October 5th, 2007 at 7:52 pm
Bahahahah! I had a hard time taking that seriously for a moment. Classy and sophisticated, she is! How desperate and pathetic.
October 5th, 2007 at 8:42 pm
I love it!!!
October 6th, 2007 at 3:02 pm
LOL, Now that’s what I call putting her back in her place.
I whish I could meet this man and shake his hand.
What a reply…
October 9th, 2007 at 4:51 pm
Nicely done, I salute her temerity too bad “The Reply” didn’t mention the hangouts and playpens of successful guys, it isn’t that hard to bag someone if you can be around them [ie bosses and their secretaries] and if you got the goods she just isn’t thinking it through…..I once asked the middle aged first wife of a Eastern Potentate how she could compete with all the lovely younger women in his harem…she said “I’m very interesting” so must be this young woman.
October 12th, 2007 at 2:29 pm
way ta tell dat trick whats up
October 13th, 2007 at 8:23 am
Beauty is skin deep. Ugly goes to the bone. A man would be better off to go to an escort service. No fuss, no muss, and the next day you won’t need a lawyer.
October 13th, 2007 at 2:18 pm
@Bill: So true.
October 14th, 2007 at 4:49 am
To be fair, the lady in question is being honest about what she wants. I’m sure there are guys out there, earning the required amount, more than happy to enter into this kind of exchange. However, I like to believe that most of us look for a mate with much more in mind than looks or money. It’s also pretty sad that she thinks that ‘being beautiful’ is all it takes to marry a successful guy. But absolutely, if she’s so smart, articulate and beautiful, why doesn’t she work on making her own money? It sounds much more powerful and pro-active than hanging around in bars waiting for someone rich to notice her.
October 16th, 2007 at 10:48 pm
@Jacqui - taking it a bit too seriously? I think it’s just a hilarious post. I love the response.
October 23rd, 2007 at 4:26 pm
You know, my wife and I were both young and hot not too many years ago. But we were also best friends.
We’re middle aged now, and neither of us looks the same as we used to. I’ve gotten heavier and she looks older, but we’ve never stopped being best friends. And looks aren’t as important when you get older. We were lying in bed the other night just talking, and I thanked God that I had her. I don’t have to worry about those superficial things any more- and let’s face it, I’m never going to be twenty five or thirty again, and I wouldn’t really want to.
We’ve never made great money the entire time we’ve been married, in fact sometimes we’ve really struggled. I will soon be going on disability. But you know what- twenty-two years of marriage later, we’re better friends now than ever, because we worked at it when times were tough. And, I find her sexier than ever.
We’re in our mid-forties now, which is still relatively young. But I did want to share that with you whippersnappers!
October 24th, 2007 at 7:12 am
I love the way that she’s pissed off about “plain Janes” taking her rightful place as an Upper East side trophy wife… if they their husbands didn’t marry them because they loved then they probably brought something else to the table (like money, a Harvard law degree or even better, connections).
Seriously, if she wants to think of marriage as a deal then she should become a beard. Though I don’t think people are marrying their beards these days.
Oh, and it sounds like she’s going for too young guys. She should be aiming for becoming 2nd or 3rd wife. Best indicator of future performance is past performance (if he has married once then he is likely to do it again).
October 24th, 2007 at 3:27 pm
hillarious! I can’t believe some people - much less that they would actually post that on craigslist…
October 31st, 2007 at 11:56 am
Friggin’ Hilarious. Servers the lady right for being so stuck up.
November 8th, 2007 at 8:49 pm
HOLLA!
November 9th, 2007 at 3:25 pm
[…] I absolute loved the reply to this Craigslist post. I found out about it on Chrys Bader’s blog. […]
November 19th, 2007 at 8:34 am
Well…..I have to give her credit for one thing, she was honest. I’m trying not to be cruel as I have been dating a man that is worth several mill however my response should be two words, desparate and golddigger. The first extended reply was well said from a mans point of view. It’s a shame that women still feel the need to use their looks and their body to “catch a man.” Maybe instead of wasting your time looking for a millionaire, you should invest in seeking a psychiatrist to learn why you feel the need to have someone take care of you, who knows he might turn out to be very wealthy. Although I dated a self-made millionaire for three years, I have learned that you can not and should not rely on any man to take care of you. You talk more about your looks then you do about how well educated you are. I am sure all men want a beautiful blonde or brunette hanging off their arm but truely, how many men want an uneducated woman? Although you were honest in your posting and showed how desparate you are in having a man take care of you, I personally think you insulted the intelligence of the opposite sex. I’m sure you were looking for a better response but I’m more impressed with the response to your request. As tacky as he could have been, he responded in a gentelman-like fashion. I don’t know if anyone could have responded any better to your inquiry without insulting you for your lack of intelligence and selfishness. I have to agree and putting it in laymans terms, if your so “hot” as you say I’m sure a man with money that your looking for will swoop you off your feet. Even if your not model material, men are eventually attracted to more then physical appearance. So at this point, you not only insulted the intelligence of men your insulting women. Real women know how to attract a man whether they have money or not. A real woman has confidence with or without a man. A real woman doesn’t show how desparate she is, a real woman gets what she wants.
February 18th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
How does a guy making “$500k plus” a year not know when to use the word ‘prospective’ versus using the word ‘perspective’?
March 12th, 2008 at 4:21 pm
That has to be the best response a person could post! LOL, good one!
March 30th, 2008 at 8:03 pm
[…] a roadblock. 250,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great […]
May 9th, 2008 at 12:06 am
This is interesting. When I read it I didn’t know if it was real or just a joke. That is way too funny.
May 29th, 2008 at 6:20 pm
“Pump and Dump” I love it!
http://www.krontzilla.com